Your child wants to be loved. His/her behaviour is his/her way of communicating to you. Young children do not have the language skills to communicate effectively, and often don't have the social and emotional skills they need to understand and express their feelings. Before you start teaching the right skills you need to establish what the problem is.

Select from the tools to decide which ones will assist your child. Did your child get frustrated right before he hit his brother? Choose a social story about using words, and perhaps play a game to teach feeling words so he can express himself better. If your not sure, try as many tools as you like until you find ones that work for you.







                       
Visual Tools:  Visual Tools help the child understand what is expected of them, communicate and reinforce messages to children. Often children find communication a challenge, especially when they are really angry. Holding up a stop sign for example may help them remember to stop, and means you don't have to rely on your voice alone. Many parents and teachers find Visuals an amazing tool to support behaviour.

Visual Tools List:

Stop Signs:                                                      Signs to assist children to stop a behaviour

Routine Cards/Schedules:                           Cards that teach children the routine so that
                                                           they feel safe, and know what is happening
                                                           in the day and when a desired activity is 
                                                           happening. This can prepare children if they 
                                                           are anxious about an upcoming event or help
                                                           children understand time better if they are 
                                                           waiting for something.

First and Then Cards/Sequence:               These cards help children deal with everyday
                                                           situations. If they only want to go outside 
                                                           and play, but do not want to put their shoes
                                                           on First then cards can assist young children
                                                           to understand they must move through one 
                                                           experience to get to a more positive one.

Cue Cards/Photos:                                       Cue cards help children remember what they
                                                           should be doing. Photos can also help 
                                                           children to understand and deal with
                                                           emotions.



Social Stories: Social Stories are books and stories about social situations that children face. They are books that are designed to help children through difficult times including starting a new school and having a new baby. You can use social stories to help children understand sharing, taking turns, empathy and initiating play with others. After you read the story you can discuss the issues in the story with your child. You might say "Look how terrible Timmy felt when Sam stole his truck". The child will then begin to develop a sense of empathy.


Social Stories List:
Sharing
Taking Turns
First Day of School
Being Rejected
Feeling Angry
Grief
Best Friend Moving Away
Tantrum in the Supermarket
New Baby
Finding Friends
Going to Preschool
Going to Big School
Bullying
Using Words
Resolving Conflict
Understanding Feelings 




Games: Games are a great way to teach children important social and emotional skills, they are a fun way to help a child identify and express feelings and learn the right thing to say in different social/conflict situations. 



Games List:

Feeling Funny:                                        This game supports children to become 
                                                              emotionally intelligent through recognising
                                                              and labelling their own feelings, learning a 
                                                              range of different emotions,  learning 
                                                              appropriate ways to express feelings and
                                                              learning appropriate vocabulary to express
                                                              feelings.

Social Charades:                                     Social Charades helps children reflect on
                                                              and develop excellent social skills. Children
                                                              learn a range of vocabulary for different 
                                                              situations, appropriate things to say for 
                                                              each situation and build confidence dealing
                                                              with all sorts of real life scenarios including
                                                              rejection, making new friends, resolving
                                                              conflicts and being bullied.

Social Board Game:                                  Children love this super fun board game.
                                                              While playing this game children rapidly
                                                              develop a number of social skills. They 
                                                              might throw a five and land in the
                                                              playground right when another child is
                                                              being bullied! What will they do? Children
                                                              learn to think critically and speak
                                                              confidently while maintaining high self
                                                              esteem.







During this stage you need to make a plan. Write down the most common behaviours that you are finding challenging. You need to decide what action you will take. Write down when you will reward your child and what you will give them. Try to reward them often, and ignore the challenging behaviours as much as possible. Try to adjust your environment so that it suits the child's needs better. Do they always cry in that restaurant? Maybe go to a more child friendly one with a playground. 



Tips to Remember:

- Acknowledge your child's feelings. "I can see you are angry you can't have a chocolate bar" Doing this helps children feel heard, being heard it releases a lot of emotional energy.

-Be consistent. Have clear expectations and always explain the reason.
-Remember positive behaviour happens in positive relationships. Give as much hugs, praise, kisses and love as you can- especially when they are being challenging. It might be tricky but it works wonders. Remind the child that you care about them as much as possible.

-Have obvious real consequences that connect to the behaviour. "If you scream in the supermarket, next time you stay home". 
-Stay calm and talk in a calm firm voice